LE GOÉLAND ^{* * * *}

Magnifique

Très bel hôtel avec terrasse du restaurant donnant sur le port de Porto Vecchio.
Petit déjeuner copieux avec de bons produits.
Merci à Raphaël du bar pour son accueil !

We stayed here for one week in one of the higher room categories (can't remember the title).

This hotel is all about surface. Only looks. Nothing seems to be thought through.
And while it's not all bad, it's definitely not good for it's price.

Let me elaborate:
The hotel itself looks kind of nice with a small garden area by the sea. It's not the best of views but it sure makes for some nice evening atmosphere. Since there's always music and noise from the kitchen vent, you won't really be able to have a real peaceful hangout there.

While the personnel was friendly, the service especially in the restaurant was bad to an almost comical extent. Although the restaurant barely had 5 tables to serve, waiters would constantly forget orders, ignore you for 30+ hours or you would get asked the same thing by 3 people in a row. There is no organization, no professional routine, it's horrible. It seems they just cast pretty boys and tell them to be a waiter. The guy who was obviously supposed to be their leader looked hung over every day and completely clueless. I don't think it's their fault, they seem to be trying... but for that hotel price it's a joke.

An example of how this all-looks-concept manifests in the rooms: In the shower, the water is supposed to come out of a carved stone on the wall. Looks cool. But if you adjust the water pressure to anything less than maximum, it won't sustain the water beam and the shower will stop. If you use maximum though, the water beam is so strong it splashes against the opposite wall and floods the entire bathroom since there is nothing but a useless shower curtain there.

It got really weird when we suddenly came back to our room and they installed a new glass-wall on our sink to prevent at least that from flooding. The silicone was still liquid, they definitely installed it while we were gone. I mean... That's kinda .. thoughtful... but wtf?

Also the floor of the shower: it was made of little round rocks. Looks cool. Slippery af. one rock obviously didn't fit so they cut it in half and you could actually cut your foot on that.

I could go on about these little things but I can summarize it like this:
Someone is really really trying to make the coolest hotel possible and it just isn't. You're paying for it anyway. For that price, you will find better service, better location, better rooms. Stay away.

The hotel’s location and views are stunning, and the staff was friendly, with the property itself being beautiful. However, I cannot recommend staying here until at least late 2027 due to the intense noise from nearby construction. Pylons are being drilled into the sea floor next door, resulting in a constant, deafening noise from sunrise to sunset. While we tried to enjoy breakfast with a serene sunrise view, the loud banging ruined the experience, and the noise continued throughout the day, making it impossible to relax. When we requested a discount at checkout due to the disruption, we were denied, despite the hotel knowing about the construction prior to our stay. Avoid this location for the next few years, or you'll likely be disappointed by the noise.

USE CAUTION: There is extensive renovation work being done in the port until 2027, including pounding new pilings into the seabed. This work begins at 9am and goes until 6pm, and you can hear the banging throughout the property.

The hotel was very nice overall, rooms were quite small but manageable for two people. All of the staff were very friendly and parking is free. Would have been 5-stars if not for the port construction noise.